Tag Archives: life

Happily ever before

I just celebrated my first year anniversary with my husband yesterday (thank you, thank you😊) and during the celebration this blog topic hit me.

I was happy before I got married.
I had already been living in my fairytale before my vow exchange..

You see, before I said “Yes” to Joe (my husband), I said “Yes” to Jesus first. Yes to His unearned gift of LIFE and Yes ultimately to His love.

I never knew Joy, love, hope, peace, courage, strength, humility, confidence, romance, purpose, patience, etc.. Until Jesus.

Trust me ladies I’m not being “Corny Christian” this is the absolute truth in the best way I could describe it..

When you meet someone, initially your reaction is to get to know them right? Right. And then having gotten to know them you desire time, and more time. So you two spend time together. During that time you grow closer in intimacy-heart wise-and then a vulnerable moment arises.. An area he wasn’t allowed to see before but because of growing trust you gave him access.. And it only strengthened your relationship because he has now seen deeper into you. He then reveals a part of himself that you’ve never experienced and it’s so good that you realize you’re in love with him. Love. You’re discovering the ins and outs of one another and finally you decide to surrender your heart to him. Fully committing yourself to a lifetime of faithful, never shaken love. ::Cues bridal entrance music::

That’s EXACTLY how it went with Jesus.
I spent time with Him. Grew closer to Him. Got vulnerable with Him. Found myself in love with Him. Then made the commitment to never look back. To never leave Him. My whole heart was and still is His.

He presented creation around me in ways I never seen before like the butterfly kisses I blogged about previously.. This love story-Jesus loving me-was my fairytale. A TRUE fairytale.

Some of you may be uncomfortable reading this. Some may feel like I am being the corny Christian but that’s just something you’re going to have to get over because this is REAL LOVE.

LOVE always had a face before your “first love” in school, (or wherever you met him..) Before he was even born or thought of, Love had Jesus’ face. And He ALWAYS loved you.

Everything you’ve ever dreamed up in romance was first dreamed up by Him. (Yes.. Even that.)

I grabbed ahold of all this in my single season and held on tight to it. I dove deep. My single season wasn’t dreadful. It was amazing. Because of this, I allowed a LOT of growth to occur then; which has truly done wonders for my marriage. Had this not happened, I’m sure we would be working on a lot more independent issues than being able to focus on US as one.

So yes your “HAPPILY EVER..” starts now. If your mindset isn’t there, do everything you can to get it going. To be able to live happily ever before AND after is a definite blessing.

I’m going to give you a list of things I did in my single season to help jump start you in how to go about it:

I stayed away from romance movies. (You groan now but trust me it helps protect your mind from building up fantasies or expectations that are just not reality. Plus it only came with a stronger lonely feeling than it would without watching these. I LOVE love and romance so it was definitely something I had to grow strength in but it paid off.)

I also protected my ears from what songs I was listening to. (Ok I realize this is starting to look like a bunch of “don’ts” but I’ll get to the “do’s” after.- love songs also build up fantasies.. I mean come on falling in love at a coffee shop?? Sure it’s dreamy but unless your life is really REALLY out there it just doesn’t happen. I wasn’t a stickler about this I would know what I could handle and what I couldn’t and I would switch the song if I started to feel anything outside of secure in my singleness.-I really did like that song though hah-)

I put my phone away.. Deleted numbers that could be tempting. (Girl, you know you can’t use the excuse of, “I just don’t like unknown numbers and need to know who’s calling or texting so I can know what to answer or not..” URT! If you don’t like unknown numbers that’s even better! You won’t answer it anyway. Old flings or boyfriends creepin up even old thoughts of “good” moments can puppet your thumbs into sending the text or call that could be destructive. The mess is too messy to chance it. Trust me again.)

– I filled my spirit up with romance from The Word. (Here comes the “do’s.. Read Song of Solomon- all of it- and have fun dissecting it. I’m sure it’ll last as long as your single season because I’m still dissecting it in my marriage haha! But it truly helped me when I needed to be reassured in my beauty or felt the need for attention.. And this is the reassurance/attention that has no repercussion-it’s perfect.)

– I got my alone time in with Papa. (Enough said. Get with Him, the encounters you have are gold alone. The visions you see, the words of affirmation you hear.. Goodness it’s that good GOOD. Most definitely.)

I made sure my self talk was healthy and encouraging. (There’s power in a woman who radiates confidence and loves herself as she is. Obviously, as women it’s hard to get to a place such as this with the media all around; so I also didn’t look at magazines or was quick to look the other way with posters of altered beauty,etc-I still do this- but building consistency and faith in it gets you far.)

I started discovering ME. My likes, dislikes, things that made me come alive, passions, desires, dreams, wants..etc. (ladies…let’s be honest, men don’t know what women want because majority of the time WE don’t even know what we want! Hah. If we spent time discovering it instead of expecting a man to we would all be happier πŸ˜„)

I held onto my hope but I didn’t keep this particular hope my main screen. (Hope is GREAT to have. It’s powerful. But to constantly have the hope of having a significant other or a husband in my view, would’ve ruined my season so much so that I would’ve been paying more attention to the thoughts that hope now came with, and lost sight of building my NOW happily ever. Focusing on the “future hope” more than your “now hope” can be fatal-might cause you to have a desire to skip seasons- Have hope, just don’t let it become your main focus now.)

Phew! That was a mouthful wasn’t it?! Ok now that I can breathe again, I hope these helped you and encouraged you instead of provoking more groans. I honestly did all these. Some I still do in my marriage, but it so helped my perspective and joy in being single.

There were other things I did or didn’t do, but I think it was molded to myself personally.. So ask Papa for help in what to do or not do. The best thing you can be is willing, (only to Jesus in this time hah) to get rid of what you should get rid of to propel you into the woman you WANT to be before marriage, before a man period. Because last time I checked, God and God alone validated my greatness, my beauty, my success, etc. My husband would be a hot mess if I expected him to do that for me. It just isn’t his job.

Ok let’s pray,

Papa, thank you thank you thank you for single seasons. Thank you for every treasure and promise that is to be found along the process of it and for being who these beauties need you to be in this time. I pray that they would be sparked with joy even now, that their perspectives would shift, so their realities can be enjoyable now. I pray they would protect their hearts, eyes, ears and minds. Thank you for loving us more than we will ever be able to comprehend this side of heaven. I also pray you would sway with them in the best dance of their life right now. So they know how to dance in their future marriages. πŸ˜‰ you’re such a great Papa, thank you. In Jesus name, amen.

I believe in you. I know it’s possible. So get excited! Happily ever before starts today 😊

* if you have any questions concerning this or you want to know more feel free to email them to me and I will most definitely respond! πŸ‘‰ weareshe1@gmail.com *

Loving you,
Tanisha Poni πŸ’œ

Advertisements

The wish your heart makes

My fellow Disney lovers knew what the title meant, but for those who don’t.. Here it is:

🎢”A DREAM is a wish your heart makes…”🎢
-Cinderella

(I don’t know what it is with the Disney inspiration lately, but just go with it..)

Have you ever spent longer than a daydream dreaming up your dream? Have you ever had the courage to Dream out loud?
Sometimes when we get a little inkling of something awesome stirring up in our imagination.. We let ourselves think, “Eh.. It’s only my imagination.. It wouldn’t be like that.. It probably won’t even happen..” Etc.

And then there goes our dream, floating away for someone else to reach out and grab it.. That’s sad. But don’t worry cause, ‘You gon learn today’ (πŸ˜„)

Story time:
When I was little my imagination was impeccable..thanks to my grandpa. He would push the envelope with me so much so that I had imaginary pets at one point.. (I won’t get into the horrid details of their tragic death, but if you want to know ask me when you see me..) I seen those pets.. I fed and played with those pets.. They even had names! Hah, why am I telling you this? Because it was my little young heart’s dream to have a “kitty cat”, But I didn’t. So my grandpa taught me such a valuable lesson on how to envision something that wasn’t there, as though it was.. And then out of that vision (my imaginary pets that I kept feeding..) the miraculous manifestation happened… I got a REAL “kitty cat” !!! 😍

I imagined my heart’s desire,
I dreamt OUT LOUD,
And then I seen it come to life.

Lesson #1:
Your imagination is the best incubator for dreaming.

Our imagination has to be boundless.. To be completely childlike in this area, is GOLD to our dreams. Nothing was impossible when we were little princesses, and today that truth hasn’t changed… Our imaginations did.

All those boarders that block off certain areas your imagination could go.. I command them to vanish NOW in Jesus’ name!
(Oh you’re welcome πŸ˜‰)

One of my aspirations in life is to have daily lived out this next favorite quote of mine, “Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.”
― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

Get your imaginative juices flowing.. Do imagination workouts.. See the lava on the ground again and don’t you dare slip off that cliff of a couch cushion..

Lesson #2:

Dream out LOUD.

Not only did I see the imaginary pets, but I called them by name, told my grandpa who was who (there were 6) and proceeded to walk out what I was seeing..taking care of them (action), etc.

Last Friday I noticed I did something similar…
It was our first S.H.E night out; (’twas totally fun I will make a S.H.E moments post on it later.)
During the night, I wanted to take pictures with each of the girls that showed up and my reasoning was this, “WHEN S.H.E gets big, I’m going to put these pictures on the archive wall of being the original girls who were there when it started..” I dreamt out loud. Not only did I hear me, but everyone around heard me.. And you just read it. This hasn’t come to life yet, but I’m not afraid to dream it. I’m not afraid to allow my imagination to go there.

Allow yourself to say it out loud for everyone to hear. Speak it. Write it. Pray it. Sing it. Live it. (Sing it is just for kicks and giggles but whatever works! πŸ˜„)

Lesson #3:

Be amazed and grateful watching your dream come alive.

When that kitty cat was brought into the room, I felt like I was floating. I had so much excitement in my little body I didn’t know what to say, but I remember hugs were given and I was just beside myself because of my first ever dream becoming reality.

If it hasn’t happened for you YET, be excited in your dreaming out loud season.. It’ll come.

My “little” dream of having a cat doesn’t have to make sense to you or anyone else.. It was my dream. So when you’re getting stirred up.. Dream for YOU, don’t dream to make sense to everyone else. Dream period. NOTHING is exempt.. Dream it ALL.

Let’s make things official,
Jeremiah 32:27 says, β€œI am the LORD, the God of all the peoples of the world. Is anything too hard for me?” Nope.

So my beautiful dreamers, what’s it going to be?

I’ll leave you with a challenge:
Write down 50 dreams. They don’t have to all pertain to what you want to become, just get those dream engines revving. (Trust me 50 isn’t anything, you’ll write more as you gain momentum πŸ˜‰)

🎢 “… If you keep on believing, the dreams that you wish, WILL come true..” 🎢 😊

Loving you,
Tanisha Poni πŸ’œ

BEE Yourself

My favorite Disney movie is Aladdin.
(I will refrain from the urges of my love for Disney and get to the point of this fact drop..)

I got the title of this post from the scene where Aladdin is trying to impress Princess Jasmine, and Genie is a bee whispering things in his ear to say to her. When that doesn’t go well, Genie makes his inspiring exit with the quote, “..But remember, BEEE yourself.” This said scene also provoked my desire to write this piece..😊

Before I started this whole blog I was hesitant because I thought, “Tons of empowering lady blogs (hah sounds like lady bugsπŸ˜„πŸž) already exist… So why should I try to make one?

You’re probably like, “GASP! Tanisha has thoughts like this pop up?!” Uhhh..YEA GIRL! Lol I’m not an exception to that junk. It happens.. but I choke that lie out with the truth like so:

Yes, there may be tons of those lady blogs BUT! There is NO ONE that will blog like you..because you are the only you.”

And.. that’s all she wrote. (Obviously I’m going to write more but you know what I meanπŸ˜‰)

Ok back on topic.. I pursued writing this blog because I knew no one was going to write EXACTLY what I’m writing, in the way I’m choosing to write it. And just like every other woman composing a blog, I have something to say. I didn’t care if women had done it before, nor about how it was successfully done. Because, there is no other Tanisha Poni I am up against, it’s just ME.

Isn’t that incredible? I’m the only me, and YOU are the ONLY you this world will EVER see.

You are completely unique. I get bothered because that word should be given more credit, and carry weight. These days it’s become clichΓ© or a nice “repost worthy” quote. (πŸ˜‘)

Oh, but it’s meaning!!

Unique /yōō’nΔ“k/ (adj) : being the only one of its kind. Unlike anything else.

Some of the synonyms are: distinct, individual, special, idiosyncratic (cause big words are awesome every now and then πŸ˜„) unrepeatable, exclusive, etc.

Now that I’ve given the English lesson for the day,
Chew on it.

You ::insert your name here:: are a ONCE in a lifetime ::insert your name here too:: !

Even if you’re a twin, you are STILL you.

Darling, this world couldn’t grow to it’s potential without your touch. I mean, that is why you have a different finger print than everyone else.. because no one, can touch the world quite like you.
(D’aww I know, cheesy, but you smiled!)

In Matthew 10:30 it says,
But even the hairs of your head are all numbered.

I realize I could’ve quoted the famous scriptures about being fearfully and wonderfully made, or about being knit in your mother’s womb, but you girls could be like, “Well, EVERYONE was created like that.. So, it’s not distinct.” (😐)

BUT!

We are women. And we do know much about our lovely locks. As well as, knowing all of our hair textures, lengths, thickness, etc, etc. are NOT the same. Hence, my chosen scripture of proof in your uniqueness. πŸ’ BAM!

The hairs on your head are numbered. He even knows about the ones that fall out in the shower while rinsing the conditioner out, and then them being pinned on the shower wall to hopefully be wiped away right AFTER your shower. πŸ˜‚ (Lol, seriously beauts.. You better clean that!)
And I’m sure those hairs were accounted for, before you even had hair to count..

Let me wrap it up:

1. Pursue YOU.

Wanna paint? Paint.
Wanna sing? Sing.
Wanna be a fashion designer? Design away.
Wanna be a nurse? Nurse it up.

Don’t disqualify yourself because of comparison to the Georgia O’Keeffe, Whitney Houston, Coco Chanel, and Florence Nightingale of the world.. (Obviously these women made history, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t anymore room in the “women’s hall of fame!”) You were created to be beautiful like YOU, not beautiful like them.

2. Release YOU in this life. Stop worrying about what’s “in” or “out”, if so and so will still like you if you come out and say you really didn’t like what they liked, or what new detox everyone is doing and secretly whining through.. Just stop it! (I don’t care if people squirm in their skin because your differences are out of their comfort zone..) don’t copy anyone else’s “you” it’s not good enough.

3. Be You! Do You! Live You!

This world is waiting gem.. 😌

Loving you,
Tanisha Poni πŸ’œ

Chin up buttercup

Beauties, we have entered into my favorite season of the year.. FALL! 😍

ONE of my favorite things (because there are plenty) about this season is the CHANGE that takes place.. The leaves don’t just transform in color, they fall. And the trees become bare, to prepare for new blossoms and growth to take place.

To some, leafless trees are ugly or scary because they’ve lost their color (and are usually in scary movie scenes to add to their discreditπŸ˜‘), but to me they’re most intriguing because I’m passionate about transformation and the process in the trees’ endurance during the cold season.

(Ok this isn’t a tree hugging post I assure you but I’m not knocking the idea! πŸ˜„ )

You and I are given the same exact opportunity to be these autumn trees. We get to allow certain things to transform within us and things to fall off to leave a place for new things to take root. (Healthy and greater things of course)

The problem with all this greatness is that many times these transformations look like trials. They may not feel good, might make you rethink your faith and not appear to mean well, but the good news is.. they can be celebrated!

I feel as though some of you have been going through a “trying” season where things left and right keep giving you a 1,2 combination (that’s some boxing lingo for ya) and you feel as though you’ve either missed it and made a bad decision, you’re losing hope, your joy is sapped, and you could probably have a major crying outburst at any given moment.. Well this is for you:

CHIN UP BUTTERCUP!

Have a giggle time out.. And then marvel at this gem of a scripture,

“Dear brothers and SISTERS, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect (full grown) and complete (faultless), needing (lacking) nothing.” James 1:2-4

Did you read that?! This trying season is giving your endurance a chance to grow (just like leaves falling off the tree.. πŸƒπŸ‚) and the great promise in this truth is the fact that your endurance has potential to fully develop ANNNND you will be full grown needing NOTHING! 😍 That’s so encouraging! (So no more eating ice cream with a shovel, or chocolate for that matter unless it’s for fun of course😜)

Guess what? …

You’re EXACTLY where you need to be.
Trust Papa at His word, and take a moment to reflect
on all these left and right blows and allow yourself to put on Joy glasses to accept them as such.

Be honored beautiful one, He wants to take you deeper! πŸ™Œ

Let me wrap it up by praying for you,

Papa, I thank you for new seasons, new depth, and transformation. I thank you that in the so called troublesome times we get to have not only joy, but GREAT joy because it is propelling our spirit of endurance to grow and strengthen. Thank you for the clarity on being right where we are supposed to be and the peace that truth releases. I pray we would be full grown and lacking nothing at the end of it all, having enjoyed our process of blossoming with you. In Jesus’s name, Amen!

😊

Loving you,

Tanisha Poni πŸ’œ

Promises, Promises

We’ve all had a promise revealed to us sometime or another. Whether it was by reading scripture, relayed to us through a prophetic word or directly from Papa in our quiet times with Him.

When we initially received this promise, it came perfectly wrapped and looked amazing right? We got all excited as if it were about to unwrap before our very eyes within the next 24 hrs.. And then, because it didn’t we held on tight to the fact that maybe these things take a little longer. So we give the promise a more realistic time to unveil… Then that MONTH goes by and still nothing… We try to have faith that it’ll happen eventually and then without even noticing we forget all about it.

You know its funny because when we were little girls and someone in the natural promised us something, we never let them forget it, until we seen that promise fulfilled. I mean hey..we wanted that bike with the basket, handle ribbons, and don’t forget that bell!

We remembered every detail of that promise, and because our hearts were so steadfast in trust to whomever promised our desires to us, we remained faithful in that trust. We had no idea what fear of being let down or hurt was. All we knew was our desire and the freshness of that promise because we kept thinking about it or asking about it.. “Daddy, remember you promised you were going to buy me a bike?”

Unfortunately today, the fear of being let down or getting our expectations to high only to be disappointed has held us back from tenaciously trusting our Heavenly Father at His word. We don’t want to ask Him about it, or declare them out. Because of that “What if, it just wasn’t for me..” or “That person was off on their prophecy..” skepticism.

Oh but what if they were right! And that promise IS for you because every single one in that Bible of yours is!

Speaking of bibles, this scripture has been fluttering around in my spirit for the past month and it just releases so much peace..

Luke 1:45 reads, “BLESSED is she who BELIEVED He would fulfill His promises to her.”

Blessed is SHE.

The word blessed in this context means to be provided with divine favor and protection!

Believe means to believe relentlessly, without needing a sign or an extra confirmation other than taking Papa at His word knowing He is a God of His word.

So, In order to be BLESSED in our promises we have to BELIEVE.

HOW POWERFULLY SIMPLE THIS IS!!!

My fellow beautiful ones, this is crucial. To have disappointment or hurt fall away..to be untouchable. It’s time we tell disappointment and all that junk to beat it!

If you remember anything remember the next 3 keys to this..(oh and the scripture.. write that down!)

3 keys to be protected from disappointment/hurt from “unfulfilled” promises:

1. B E L I E V E Him. If you feel Papa specifically promised you something believe Him for it.. don’t give Him time frame ultimatums.. just believe.

2. WRITE out your promises! Document them all, so you have them in front of you during your quiet times with Him and thank Him for them! They should be posted up on your wall more so than that swim suit model is for physical motivation.. have yourself some spiritual motivation girl!

3. DECLARE them out. Declarations are huge. Words create worlds, (Proverbs 18:21) Speak life over your promises instead of death.

Guess what? I don’t care how long it’s been since that promise you so deeply desire to see unwrapped has been given to you. I don’t care if it’s as ancient as the hills. Now you have tools to not care either πŸ˜‰

Lastly, remember Papa knows what He is doing. He isn’t that ex boyfriend, or even like our earthly fathers (regardless how good they are) He is GREATER and He keeps His promises.

So hold on to your trust/faith lovely, He’s not done just yet.

Loving you,

Tanisha Poni πŸ’œ

Pep talk for the tough days

Ladies, I feel like some of you are in need of a pep talk in the “life happening now” area of your life haha..so here you go:

KEEP GOING. It’s not over..
DO NOT give up..
It IS possible and you WILL succeed!
You are MORE than a conqueror!! (Romans 8:37) MORE THAN! Come on somebody!! πŸ˜„

Ok, now that we got that 10 second pep talk in, let me explain a little more about embracing the process/choosing to find the light IN the tunnel instead of being so desperate to see the light at the end of it.

When you think about it… In life, there isn’t a destination. There’s no moment of arrival.. Or a finish line once we achieve that goal or dream (ultimately success)

Life is a J O U R N E Y.

So why are we all in a hurry??

What if we started to view achieving our goals like a check point (I love check points in video games..It’s like if you end up failing while in route to your next goal you get to come back and lean on your last victory to encourage you to try again because we do go from glory to glory!-2 Corinthians 3:18) and then we pursue the journey to our next dream on the list.

No one said getting to your wildest dreams would be easy but, they do say dreams are worth the pursuit.

So right now.. You might still be in school of some kind.. Still figuring out if you even want to continue doing what you’re doing..majoring in that major…and working part time or full time at a job or two that you might not want to make a career out of, or are learning how to be a housewife like myself! πŸ˜„ etc..etc..

BUT WAIT!!

As women it’s easy to over analyze or question our state in life, It happens to all of us at some point. But, we have to be aware that sometimes it isn’t our questions.. the enemy and his confusing questions can pop up such as, “Did God really say…??” (Genesis 3:1) Annoying I know but we have a SOUND MIND remember?! πŸ˜‰ say,”NO” to camping out at self doubt! πŸ’ͺ

C H O O S E to find the light in the dark tunnel. (the process)

Choose to rejoice in the fact that you’re well on your way. (Philippians 3:12-14) The worst thing you can do is be in a rush.. There’s not a time limit on your accomplishments, yes there’s a ticking clock.. But you are the one who is in control of how much time you have.. You truly are. You’re capable of MAKING time. So make it.

A hero of mine once said,
never compare your beginning to someone else’s middle” and it struck me.
As Americans there’s this ugly thing that got rooted within us to “get up.learn.work.repeat” in order to achieve the fullness of life. And to do it FAST. Now! Now! Now! Cause if you don’t you’re going to be left behind..

Well my heroines, life does keep moving on and people around you may seem to be in a way better spot, But your life and all the opportunities/seasons that should come within it aren’t one of those infomercials on tv where you gotta “act now!” to get the two for one special or “call in the next 15 minutes or this deal is gone!

URT!
This is a lie. You have more than enough time.. If an opportunity comes up it won’t be the last time.. Don’t feel pressured to take EVERY opportunity that presents itself well either (they may not be all they seem.. Pray about them and then obey Papa at His word πŸ˜‰)

So pace yourself..

Take the “scenic route” in your amazingly beautiful life and intentionally enjoy the view along the way. You’ll see things more clearly that you may not have noticed before because then it was just a blur.

Be confident in the TRUTH that you are gaining ground.. There’s much greatness stored up within you and Papa loves you too much to leave you where you’re at! Just don’t be in a hurry to “get there..”
No matter if you end up taking a wrong turn..(or what you think is a short cut), He always ends up working things out for the good in perfect timing.. 😊 (Romans 8:28)

So milk this encouragement! Soak it all up and allow it to soothe your mind and give you a bit more clarity on your wonderful pursuit in life.

Just remember these three things (if anything):
1. You’re BRILLIANT and well on your way.
2. Don’t be in such a rush.. Remember life is a journey.
3. Rejoice in your process and high five others who have surpassed you..cause in your own timing you’ll be there.
4. (Yea it’s my blog I can add a bonus one) Be your biggest cheerleader.. Fuel your journey with life words!

Lastly this gem of a scripture (referenced above) that helped and continues to help me enjoy the process..
“I’m not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don’t get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I’ve got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onwardβ€”to Jesus. I’m off and running, and I’m not turning back.” (‭Philippians‬ ‭3‬:‭12-14‬ MSG)

That’s it I’m done.
Get out of here beautiful and go enjoy your process! πŸ˜ƒ

Loving you,
Tanisha Poni πŸ’œ